Tiger Woods is a PIMP.

US Weekly is reporting that NINE (9) women other than his wife have seen/had in side them, his wiener.

On Sunday, New York’s Daily News reported that Cori Rist, a 31-year-old blonde “Manhattan clubgoer” had a six-month affair with Woods after meeting him at NYC hot spot Butter last year…

Meanwhile, London’s Daily Mail is reporting that porn star Holly Sampson also had sexual relations with Woods, making her woman No. 7 (they met before he was married). According to her IMDb page, Sampson is a 36-year-old actress whose film credits include Descent Into Bondage and Diary of a Horny Housewife…

A source tells Us the woman “is unique in that she knows Mr. Woods’ ways, his home, his habits, his idiosyncrasies.”

Woods was first linked to NYC club manager Rachel Uchitel, who has denied an affair.

Jaimee Grubbs, a 24-year-old cocktail waitress, then broke the news to the new issue of Us Weekly that she began having an affair with Woods in April 2007

Since then, Mindy Lawton, Kalika Moquin and Jamie Jungers have all claimed flings as well.

Bro, this dude is LAYING PIPE. I mean how the hell does he do it? HOW MUCH TIME DOES HE HAVE???1

Now there is only one thing I wanna goof on him about, he didn’t have a hoe phone, and this is the result:

Not for nothing, with the money he is paying out, I might reveal MY secret affair with him.

(BTW: how dope is the google ad?)

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Make this viral and you get 1,000,000 internet dollars.

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3 comments

  1. This would make a great reality show, like American Idol. We'll call it "America's Got Woods"

  2. "Sampson is a 36-year-old actress whose film credits include Descent Into Bondage and Diary of a Horny Housewife…" NICE.

  3. I find tiger woods like a whiteboy with black featureshe doesn;t like the other have of him but one day he will aknowledge us like micheal jackson did but brutter you are still a prodogy of golf

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