Once again, nothing really tickles my fancy at the Megaplex this weekend, but I’ll tell you what’s up anyways. Now sit back, relax, and read what the hell I have to say about Good Deeds, Gone, Act of Valor, and Wanderlust
Good Deeds is yet another CERTIFIED PIECE OF SHIT by Tyler Perry.
For all of you that have read my past articles, I despise this man, and think he is one of the MOST OVERRATED talents, or I like to say, “lack thereof” in Hollywood.
So yea, FUCK THIS MOVIE.
Gone is your typical thriller film. It tells the story of Jill, (played by my tittie fuck crush, Amanda Seyfried) a former kidnapping victim who learns of her sister’s current disappearance. She becomes convinced that the serial killer who kidnapped her a year ago has returned and is looking for her.
Jill sets out to once again face her abductor, while searching for clues on her sister’s whereabouts and having the police are chasing her.
In short, there’s nothing special besides Seyfried’s tits.
Act of Valor is an American war action film about a Navy SEAL squad that goes on a covert operation to rescue a kidnapped CIA officer, while also taking down terrorists who aim to strike America. It stars relatively unknowns, along with actual active duty U.S. Navy SEALs, and U.S. Navy Special Warfare Combatant Crewmen.
I mean call me an ass, but they have been marketing the hell out of this movie by letting everyone know it stars actual active duty officers. My BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD is in the U.S. Army, so I have mad respect for our armed forces, but now they are movie stars? Yea, no thanks.
That fact alone make me right off the bat say, this is gunna suck. Let them do the real stuff, leave the actors to acting. This movie just makes me angry for the mere fact that I’M not walking on the red carpet for MY movie premiere right now.
Wanderlust is a comedy film produced by Judd Apatow, directed by David Wain, starring Jennifer Aniston and Paul Rudd, as a married couple who try to escape modern society by leaving their cushy lives in New York.
I am a HUGE Paul Rudd and David Wain fan, but for some reason I can’t get behind this movie. It just looks so FUCKING STUPID. I mean doesn’t this plot remind you of a Direct-to-Video Release? After an urban couple purchases a place in New York, the husband loses his job.
With no other options, the couple leaves for Georgia to live with family. Along the way, they stay at a bed and breakfast hotel that turns out to be a hippie commune.
At this time you should be shaking you head and saying, “Charlie’s right, it does.” Sorry Judd and Paul, but you can’t win them all.
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