We’ve all seen the photos of hot chicks playing video games, we’ve all dreamt of scoring with them. (sorry, that was bad) Over at T1GN, Moondoogie’s got the 411 on exactly how that’s now possible!
Launching today is a brand new site geared towards adult gamers called GameCrush. With GameCrush there will be no more nightly gaming sessions with just a bunch of random dudes. Now you will be able play with a gorgeous gamer girl one-on-one. Here’s the catch: you have to pay.
I came across this song after listening to Doug Benson’s podcast “I Love Movies.” It amazed me how they managed to so accurately describe every party, club and bar I have ever been to while growing up in New York mainly Staten Island and Brooklyn. Oh the good ol’ days…now I get to listen to hicks blasting Carrie FUCKING Underwood all fucking day.
Garfunkel and Oates is a comedy-folk duo from Los Angeles, California, consisting of actress-songwriters Kate Micucci and Riki Lindhome. The two met at the Upright Citizens Brigade theatre in Los Angeles. The duet was formed when they started working together to turn a short film made by Lindhome, entitled “Imaginary Larry”, into a musical.Lindhome hails from Portville, New York; Micucci is from Pennsylvania.
In February 2009, the Garfunkel and Oates song “Fuck You” (reworked as “Screw You”) was featured in the Scrubs episode “My Lawyer’s In Love”. In March 2009, Micucci announced in a bulletin on MySpace that the two had entered the studio to record an EP. (via Wikipedia)
I was reading Chris Hardwick’s recent post about the missing actor Andrew Koenig, when on the bottom of the page I saw this post title “Death Bed Subtext w/ Topher Grace & Kate Bosworth (NSFW x a million)” so I click and yes it is in no way shape or form Safe For Work, but it is hilarious.
Good news for everyone who love’s to get free stuff anybody who pre-orders Battlefield: BC2 will be upgraded to the Limited Edition pack for FREE. Yes folks, for free…buy the standard edition and while supplies last because remember it is LIMITED Edition, you will be upgraded to the Limited Edition pack for no extra money.
So for those of you saying, “But good Sir I haven’t pre-ordered my copy yet.” Don’t worry you still have time to go to your local Gamestop, Best Buy, Toys R’ Us, etc and pre-order your very own copy and have it upgraded for FREE FREE FREE FREE*.
You might be saying to yourself, “Oh awesome but, Mr. MoonDoggie what comes with the Battlefield: Bad Company 2 Limited Edition pack?”, well I with be glad to tell you. You will be receiving 6 exclusive unlocks and they are:
4 upgrades for the vehicles including armor improvements and motion sensors
2 classic guns from Battlefield 1943
These will be ready and immediately available for Multiplayer use. Battlefield: Bad Company 2 is due out early March 2010.
I can tell you from experience that this Achievement/Trophy is missable because the 3 times I had to back track to find all the coins and the second playthrough required to get the last Beatrice stones, I ran right passed him and went about the rest of the game. So, to make sure that you do not suffer the same fate as me here’s a little guide to help you on your travels.
P.S. I still need to play again to get all the holy and unholy relics YAY!
Okay, so if you’re all like me and love to get a quick boost in your gamerscore/trophy collection then this isn’t an achievement for you! You will need to level up the Devastator then find enemies that can easily be killed and that’s where my video come in handy.
I have never read the epic poems, but I do kind of understand the basics and having a wife with an English degree sitting there watching me play helps me see the differences from the poem and the game. With that said, I love this game and can see and completely understand why the developers made the decision to change some aspects to make the game more “realistic”. Could you imagine the game as a poet and just being led through hell, no that would be boring like the Lord of the Rings trilogy. A fallen warrior who has basically lost his faith is the perfect hero.
Dante fights his way through hell to rescue his wifes soul, because he’s knows it was his fault that she is even there to begin with.
The story starts with you fight a “holy war”, after you fight death and kick his ass back to hell, you head home to find your father and wife murdered and Lucifer now own her soul, now the fun stuff.
You have to fight your way through the 9 circles of hell to rip Lucifer, but before you get to him you’ll have to fight unbaptized babies, gluttons, naked whores with demon-hook penis’, demon bat things, etc. I’ll let you see the rest of the twisted enemies for yourself.
The gameplay is simple and fluid, easy button mashing will do the trick, what isn’t easy is the lack of camera control. I am used to the right thumbstick being used for the camera, not so much for this game. I have died so many times because I wanted to move the camera and forgot the the right thumbstick is for evading. The scenery is beautiful, who knew hell could be so demoniacally peaceful with their pillars of penis’s, a naked woman who’s nipples have tongues and spit out unbaptized babies with sword hands and what not. The cut scenes are unbelievably amazing such an attention to detail, the story is great I received both Dante’s Inferno and Bioshock 2 the same day and I played a lot of Bioshock 2 before putting Dante in but since I put it in I haven’t been able to take it out (ewww dirty).
The story is truly fantastic and engrossing so much so that my wife now wants her xbox fixed (fucking red rings) so that she can play it herself, and having loved the poem so much and already seeing the differences wants to not only play it but play it on the hardest difficulty.
I already know the haters are out there say stuff like, “it’s just a God of War rip off”, but honestly I have played GOW and the story is okay, I can definitely see the similarities in game play, but I am going to hold my which is better decision until i get to play GOW3.
If you don’t have this game yet, it is definitely worth the money, go out and get it now unless you don’t like naked women and penis pillars and killing evil babies.
If you were like me growing up and have seen Child’s Play, you have always wanted to see other toys like the Good Guy doll go on murderous rampages (I have loved horror movies since I was 6 so I occasionally have weird thought…sue me!). Well now our dreams have become reality, with Naughty Bear the game.
Naughty Bear is a teddy bear, hell bent on revenge for being the only teddy not invited to a birthday party. Roam the streets and scare the stuffing out of the other teddy bears before impaling them with your machete, bustinga cap in their asses with your gat, going Texas Chainsaw Massacre on them with your Chainsaw, and a variety of other weapons to choose from.
Due to the large number of choices the player can make each playthrough will be different. The A.I. is will have the other teddy’s form factions to try and take you down, before you can take them out for good. You earn points through scaring the stuffing out of the out bears, intimidating them and killing the crap out of them.
2010 is going to be a great year for gamers with the release of so many great games and sequels and I just want to help you guys navigate through it all.
Bioshock 2 (2/9/2010)
Set 10 years after the first Bioshock the halls of corridors of Rapture are all a flutter with violence. An unknown monster has been kidnapping little girls along the Atlantic coastline and bringing them back to the underwater city. You play a Big Daddy the first Big Daddy actually upon reactivation you have no recollection of what transpired over the last decade. You start to search for the little sister you were matched with all those years ago, the story will progress from there I don’t want to ruin the rest.
Final Fantasy XIII (3/9/2010)
I have know idea how to explain this storyline because it’s confusing as shit so I’ll let wiki do the talking…
The plot of Final Fantasy XIII, taking place in a world known as Pulse, revolves around the fal’Cie (ファルシ farushi?) (pronounced /ˈfælsiː “fal see”/), mechanical beings of godlike power created from crystals residing inside them.[10] People who are marked by the fal’Cie for greater purposes are called l’Cie (ルシ rushi?).[21] Each l’Cie has a Focus, a goal the fal’Cie wants him or her to fulfill within a certain amount of time; however, the fal’Cie do not explicitly say what the goal is: l’Cie learn what their Focus is by interpreting visions that are given to them. L’Cie gain the ability to summon Eidolons (monsters who fight with the l’Cie), but this ability comes with a price: if a l’Cie dies before completing his or her Focus, fails to tame his or her Eidolon, or fails to complete his or her Focus within a set period of time, he or she becomes a monster known as a Cie Corpse (シ骸 shigai?).[22] If a l’Cie does complete his or her Focus, the reward is not much better: permanent transformation into a crystal. For this reason, being chosen as a l’Cie is seen as a curse.
Some 1,300 years ago, a fal’Cie named Orphan constructed a paradise for humanity: the shell-like city of Cocoon, which floats high above the surface of Pulse. Then Orphan created life forms and machines for Cocoon’s inhabitants to use, and humanity flourished. Over time, after disaster destroyed Oerba Village and wiped out its residents, the people of Cocoon began to fear for the safety of their world, worrying that it would be cast down from the sky into the hell that they saw Pulse to be.
Although most Cocoon citizens have never seen Pulse with their own eyes, they have been told that it is a dangerous place that has strange effects on those who venture down to its surface. Consequently, anyone who is discovered to have visited Pulse is immediately subjected to quarantine and exile by the theocratic government of Cocoon, known as the Sanctum.[23] The Sanctum enforces this policy with its strongest military branch, which is called PSICOM.
As Snow leads the resistance group Team Nora in an attempt to stop the purging of civilians, the mysterious Lightning fights her way past PSICOM soldiers with the aid of Sazh to find a Pulse fal’Cie, Anima, who turned her sister, Serah (who is also Snow’s fiancée), into a l’Cie. Through a chain of events, these three, along with two exiles, Vanille and Hope, are forced by the fal’Cie of Pulse to become l’Cie, and with that become enemies of humanity with the Focus of bringing about the downfall of Orphan and Cocoon.
See I told you confusing.
Heavy Rain (2/23/2010)
The hunt is on for the Origami Killer (he leaves folded paper shapes on victims). Four characters, each with their own motives, take part in a desperate attempt to stop the killer from claiming a new victim.Every single decision you make in this game no matter how small will have consequences.
Fallout: New Vegas (6/1/2010)
Nothing is really known about this game but that it will be taking place in a Las Vegas type setting and that it will be in the same universe as Fallout 3 but will be a completely separate storyline. If it is anything like like Fallout 3 and Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion it is sure to be awesome.
Halo: Reach (9/1/2010)
Nothing is really know about the storyline but I will try my best to find news.
Mass Effect 2 (1/26/2010)
Set two years after the original, Commander Shepard must now stop an unknown enemy that has been silently abducting entire human colonies, and with the of his elite squad and a ruthless group known as Cerberus, that will stop at nothing the ensure mankinds survival.
Castlevania: Lord of Shadows (TBD):
A new Castlevania game will be hitting the shelves hopefully sometime this year and the franchise is supposed to be rebooted. but for now this is what i can tell you of the story.
You play Gabriel Belmont a member of an elite group of holy knights known as the “Brotherhood of Light “. You help protect innocent people against the supernatural, but when your wife is brutally murdered by one of the “Lords of Shadow” a group who are rapid taking over this world, her spirit sends you on a mission to save the world. Patrick Stewart voice one of the main characters and voices the teaser trailer.
Gran Turismo5 (11/1/2010)
It’s a racing game…but it does look beautiful!
Crackdown 2 (5/1/2010)
I believe this game takes place ten years after the first. During a mission in the first game you let out a group of mutants, now ten years later whole sections of Pacific City are walled up and quarantined and it’s up to you to set things right. If you love an open world game with rag doll physics, then you’ll love this game. I have spent hours picking up people throwing them into a dumpster, then picking up said dumpster and throwing it into the air, to then shooting it with a rocket launcher so that I could watch the flaming bodies rain down from the heavens.
MY PICKS:
Alan Wake (4/12/2010):
2 or 3 years ago when I was about to get my first Xbox 360, I was looking at all the games that I wanted to get and at the top of the list wasn’t Halo but Alan Wake.
Alan Wake is a best-selling horror novelist, who came to the seemingly peaceful Washington town of Bright Falls, to escape from the painful memories of the lost of his fiancée. Now trapped and the sun setting he must solve a mystery before he is trapped in this nightmarish world forever.
Batman: Arkham Asylum 2
From what I can gather the sequel will take place shortly after the end on the first game. The Joker is still a bloody mess and still managed to break out. This time however we will be fighting all the scum of the city on the streets of Gotham City. Who will this crop of villains will be? Your guess is as good as mine.
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