Archive for the FMK category

Posted on Mar 01, 2010 by JaneBlow — FMK / Humor / Sports — 1 comment

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: Olympians

I have to admit I didn’t watch much of the Olympic Games, but I did hear these names alot and after some light research, I have to agree they are quite FMKable!  Special thanks to a friend in VT for this one ;)

Let the ceremony begin…Time to play FMK!

Women: Joannine Rochette, Kim Yu-na and Torah Bright.

Men: Steve Holcomb, Apolo Ohno, and Evan Lysacek.

Do you go for the gold? (ha, ok, that one was stupid…)

Who would you Do, I Do, and Do in?

<3 Jane

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Posted on Feb 22, 2010 by JaneBlow — FMK / Humor / Movies & TV / Sex — No comments

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: What? Really?

I don’t know what I was thinking with this one honestly, but I thought it was pretty funny after I came up with it. Maybe its one of those “Which one of these things is not like the other” games too. So, uh, yeah… have fun?

Take out your thinking caps… time to play FMK!!

Women: Roseanne Barr, Kathy Bates, and Rosie O’Donnell.

Men: Marilyn Manson, Boy George, and Tom Green.

Same rules apply though, even if *I* don’t know what is going on lulz, who would you Do, I Do and Do in?

<3 Jane

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Posted on Feb 15, 2010 by JaneBlow — FMK / Sex / Sexpert Jane Blow — No comments

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: Dead People

I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’m nursing a wicked hangover.  I feel half dead, and it got me thinking… thats something I haven’t covered yet.  We do cover the death happenings here and I don’t count the Vampire FMKs I did a while back. With no further adieu…

Bring out ye dead… Time to Play FMK!

Women: Brittney Murphy, Marilyn Chambers, and Farrah Fawcett.

RIP: Rollin with the homies

RIP: Ivory Soap and the porno Behind the Green Door.

RIP: Good Night Charlie…

Men: DJ AM, Jett Travolta, and Jack Wrangler.

RIP: Crazy Town

RIP: Seizures Suck

RIP: Sex Machine (He was a gay/straight porn actor for those who don’t know)

Figuratively speaking… who would you have Done, Did, and Do in?

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Posted on Feb 08, 2010 by JaneBlow — FMK / Music / Sex — 1 comment

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARY – KILL: Palladia Concerts

I’m not home often, lots of saving peoples’ sex lives n all, so excuse my ignorant ass for JUST discovering Palladia!  Live concerts of all genres? SIGN ME UP YO! Also, I <3 DVR.

This week’s FMK is thanks to my new favorite TV station.

Women: Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, and Alanis Morissette.

Men: John Mayer, Jason Mraz and ZZ Top.

Whether you go by hotness, what mood the songs put you in, or musical talent – who would You Do, I Do, and Do In?

<3 Jane

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Posted on Feb 02, 2010 by JaneBlow — FMK / Sex — No comments

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: Porn Stars pt Deux

Rules:  Fuck one, Marry one, and Kill the third.  Got it?

My life is so full of porn porn porn, it is so awesome.  It is really easy for me to just keep listing porn stars for you but I have to keep it mixed up because porn gets boring after a while (for me anyway).  But since the AVN Awards, and all the new year releases, I’ve gotten “stuck” watching alot of porn for work… oh noes!  Here are a few stars that made my job easier.

Links are  v e r y  NSFW! Special thanks to PornHub!

Women: Sasha Grey, Alexis Texas and Audry Hollander.

Best head in the buis imo… if you like it sloppy.

Great ass, not too many blondes have an ass like hers.

And a ginger for good measure; shes an animal.

Men: Nacho Vidal, Mr. Marcus, and Jack Lawrence.

Speaking of Animals… O M G.

Great Big…Talent…

Watch “Chemistry” directed by Tristan Taormino.

Alright people, who would you Do, I Do, and Do in?

<3 Jane

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Posted on Jan 25, 2010 by Carlo — FMK / Featured / Movies & TV / Sex — 11 comments

Time to Play F**K – Marry – Kill: Jersey Shore Edition

Hey guize, it’s Carlo here covering for the amazing Jane Blow this week.

This past weekend, I had a rousing conversation with Kristin’s (my girlfriend’s) family about the Jersey Shore. We discussed the use of the racial slur Guido (as it’s essentially the N-word without the guilt), the shooting style (Cinema Verité at it’s finest), and even the social implications of this show on Middle America (where Italians are basically N-words and there is never any guilt about it). But one thing we didn’t talk about was which one’s we bang. I mean, I’d probably toss a sazeech (guidonics®  for sausage) to any of them, but then again, I’m a jerkoff.

For the guys: Fuck, Marry, or Kill each of these guidettes.

Snooki
She looks like she has the body of a regular person smushed into the size of a bowling ball. - Bobby Bottleservice.
“She looks like she has the body of a regular person smushed into the size of a bowling ball.” – Bobby Bottleservice.

JWoww
HAM ::pbbbssstttttt::
HAM ::pbbbssstttttt::

Sammi Sweetheart
Seriously, the sweetest girl ya evah met.
Seriously, the sweetest girl ya evah met.

Editors Note: I didn’t include Angelina “Jolie” cuz she’s a fucking tool. FIGHT ME YOU DUMB SOUTH SHORE BITCH. (sorry)

Alright, now ladies, decide your fate with these meatball eating greaseballs. (boooooo. because the joke sucked.)

DJ Pauly D
His DICK is PIERCED.
His DICK is PIERCED.

The Situtaion
Moar like The fucking whiney ass bitch situation amirite?
Moar like “The fucking whiney ass bitch situation” amirite?

Ronnie “Ron Ron”
The recipe for Ron Ron Juice is depressing. Please kill this one.
The recipe for Ron Ron Juice is depressing. Please kill this one.

Editors Note: I’ve omitted Vinny, ‘cuz I actually like him too much.

Okay, okay tell us who you would “do”, “I do”, or “do in” in the comments.

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Posted on Jan 19, 2010 by JaneBlow — FMK / Sex — 1 comment

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: Full House

It was just recently Thowback Week on Facebook, and I didn’t participate.  Sadly I didn’t have any kid pictures of myself scanned into a computer I had any access to.  So I’m going to Throw-Back this FMK instead!  Do you remember Full House, and watching it as a kid?

For those not following the game so far …FMK could be torture, but it is all in good fun.  It was made famous by Howard Stern and movies like Step Brothers and it is called “FUCK – MARRY- KILL”. Basically, we give you a Trio of People, and out of the three you have to pick one to Fuck, another to Marry, and the other you have to Kill.

Get ready to refresh your memory – Time to play FMK!

Women: Becky Katsopolis, DJ Tanner, and Kimmy Gibbler.

fmkauntbecky

fmkdjtanner

fmkkimmygibbler

Men: Danny Tanner, Joey Gladstone, and Jesse Katsopolis.

DannyTannerBobSaget

fmkJoeyGladstone

fmkjohnstamos

Who would you HAVE Done, I Did and Did In?

<3 Jane

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Posted on Jan 04, 2010 by JaneBlow — FMK / Sex — No comments

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: Gingers 3.0!!

For those not following the game so far …FMK could be torture, but it is all in good fun.  It was made famous by Howard Stern and movies like Step Brothers and it is called “FUCK – MARRY- KILL”. Basically, we give you a Trio of People, and out of the three you have to pick one to Fuck, another to Marry, and the other you have to Kill.

Grab your flame retardant skivvies Ive got more Fire Crotch for ya – Time to Play FMK!!

Women: Debra Messing, Molly Ringwald, and Marcia Cross.

20030921_mes_w38_501.jpg

FMKmollyringwald

FMKmarciacross

Men: Axl Rose before the makeover, Conan O’Brien, and Damian Lewis.

FKAxlRose

FMKconanobrian

Universal Amphitheatre

Who would you Do, I Do and Do In?

Please send any FMK suggestions to SexpertJaneBlow@gmail.com!

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Posted on Dec 28, 2009 by JaneBlow — FMK / Movies & TV / Sex — 1 comment

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: ROUND SPIT-FIRES

Ok, here is a tough one because likely, you’ll want to kill everyone.  Resist the urge and play the game,  remember “round” is a shape, and that got alot of pep in their step!

For those not following the game so far …FMK could be torture, but it is all in good fun.  It was made famous by Howard Stern and movies like Step Brothers and it is called “FUCK – MARRY- KILL”. Basically, we give you a Trio of People, and out of the three you have to pick one to Fuck, another to Marry, and the other you have to Kill.

You must be at least ^THIS^ tall to … FMK!

Women: Rhea Perlman, Linda Hunt and Ellen Albertini Dow (google young pics of her, she was a hottie!).

rhea-perlman

NCIS: LOS ANGELES

weddingsinger

Men: Dan Fogler, Danny DeVito and Jason Alexander.

Dan_Fogler

danny_devito

jalexander_375x375

Who would You Do, I Do and Do In?

<3 Jane

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Posted on Dec 21, 2009 by JaneBlow — FMK / Music / Sex — No comments

TIME TO PLAY F**K – MARRY – KILL: HOLIDAY MUSICANS

I may not love to shop for the holidays, or love the fact that there aren’t NEW holiday songs just remixes of the same few BUT I do love to listen to a good holiday playlist once or twice around this time.  I picked some artists who’ve sang some festive songs for the winter season.

If you want to respond with your FMK answers AND your favorite holiday song/artist maybe we can get a really good playlist going too!

For those not following the game so far …FMK could be torture, but it is all in good fun.  It was made famous by Howard Stern and movies like Step Brothers and it is called “FUCK – MARRY- KILL”. Basically, we give you a Trio of People, and out of the three you have to pick one to Fuck, another to Marry, and the other you have to Kill.

Stop decking the halls for a minute – Time to Play FMK!

Women: Mariah Carey, Whitney Houston, and Taylor Swift.


What a set of … pipes!


Classic.


Say hello to the newbie on the block!

Men: John Olivia (of The Trans-Siberian Orchestra), Adam Sandler, and Dave Seville (of Alvin and the Chipmunks).


METAL HOLIDAY!


Making Chanukah Fun.


okok, you got me, I just like this song, and had to figure out a way to get it in :)

Now that you’re all mistletoe’d up, who would You Do, I Do and Do In?

happy holidays
<3 Jane

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