This edition features Weezer live in Japan circa 2005. Enjoy.
Surf Wax America:
Dope Nose:
Across the Sea:
Why Bother:
Don’t Let Go:
The Good Life:
This is Such a Pity:
Undone(the sweater song):
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Posts in November, 2008
CONCERTS IN FULL: Weezer…
Movie Songs I Want New Found Glory to Cover
Back in 2000, power punk quintet New Found Glory released an EP called “From the Screen to your Stereo” consisting solely of cover songs featured prominently in popular movies. That (In my humble opinion) classic release featured such awesome covers as “Goonies Are Good Enough” from the Goonies and “The Glory of Love” from some other movie that i can’t remember! in 2007 they released a full length follow up called “From the Screen to Your Stereo Part II.” That one featured songs like “king of Wishful Thinking” and “Stay” which is actually a duet with Lisa Loeb, HOT. Heading into 2009, NFG is recording their seventh full length of original tracks, but I’m itching for more movie covers.
To help ease the process along I’ve decided to make a few suggestions.
Let’s start with the obvious one (Well, obvious to my friend Elyse who pointed it out to me lol)
Scotty Doesn’t Know – Eurotrip
Yeah, I know. It’s already a punk song, and there’s not much NFG could do with it. Except perform it better than Lustra. By the way, Lustra has this song on their album “Left For Dead”, which is good news for them being all of the rest of the tracks on the album suck donkey dick.
Sugar High – Empire Records
This is from a time when Rene Zellweger was still really hot. Maybe it’s because she was 26 years old. Maybe it’s that crazy short skirt, either way that sex scene with Rex Manning taught me much about being a man. Thanks Rexy, you so sexy!
Degenerated – Airheads
You know, I think this is really Brendan Frasier singing here. And i don’t particularly feel the need to jam pencils in my ears or do the Van Gough thing and cut them off entirely. This song is catchy, and who doesn’t want to see Steve Buschemi hump a guitar?
We’re All Dudes – Good Burger
Less Than Jake (A personal favorite of mine) must have been really hurting/high when they we’re approached about this one. Then again this song speaks to me, and they must have known Kel Mitchell would be a good contact to have. If that’s the case, they were right with Kel being all over SNL now. Wait. What?
Cuban Pete – The Mask
God I miss funny Jim Carrey. Yes Man better be funny or god help me…
Time of My Life – Dirty Dancing
and Unchained Melody – Ghost
These are on here either because I’m a little effeminate or secretly in love with Patrick Swayze.
Twist and Shout – Ferris Beuller’s Day Off
I don’t care what Paul McCartney thinks. This song is better with the horns in it. You heard that McCartney? Yeah… Back away slowly… That’s right… Punk
Can’t Take My Eyes Off You – 10 things I hate about you
It’s even more fun if you imagine ol’ Heathy in his Dark Knight joker makeup while singing this. It really helps you ignore the fact that he’s singing to Julia Stiles who makes me want to vomit.
Thanks NFG, I’ll be waiting for my covers album in the mail.
PS. I CCd the entire internet on this one, if anyone remembers anything i forgot just add the youtube video to the comments.
Tags: video
8 commentsCan I Haz Answers?…
As a human being, I have often wondered to myself, while staring at a wall of drying paint, why people write? Of course, I’m not beyond the principle that we, as a mass, mesh, and even microcosm of our own universe often write to convey a particular message and to communicate. I get that. What I have a hard time grasping is why people write certain things out of passion.
For instance, I once stumbled across a play, on the internet, that someone wrote about red, white, and blue-colored aliens from another dimension flying to earth in a spaceship made of cardboard with the sole prospect for them being the eradication of the complete Arabic population. One can only assume that such a brazen and irrational premise could only have been thought up by a gun-toting hillbilly who just happens to have a penchant for watching too-much Dr. Who while chugging copious amounts of Miller Light in their parent’s basement. One might just be right.
As I sat at my computer, wondering what would drive someone to write this kind of arbitrary science-fiction/political propaganda, I began to realize that it could only be one thing. One very simple, right-in-front-of-your-face kind-of thing: The Internet.
The internet is to our generation what the black hood was to the formal executioners of the 1700s. It is anonymity. It is freedom. Anonymity gives us, as citizens of a planet, the right to get away with anything and everything. If a man, heterosexual or other, could legally and socially get away Scot-free with sexing a medium-sized domesticated animal with nothing more than a pair of saftey sissors and a pair of iced tongs he would. Say no all you want, America; you know in your hearts I’m right. The fact that anyone can have access to the internet and create a digital life very much akin to their exclusive likings and tastes, then go forth and spew any sort of philosophy they want is amazing yet frightening. It’s frightening because of power.
There is great power in being anonymous. The trick, you see, is being anonymous and credible. If you can master both, then you, my mysterious friend, can have the world by it’s proverbial balls. When I say “credible” I’m not even talking about matters of being truthful; I’m talking about will people want to come back to your web page because they admire the cut of your jib and will hang on to your every word until you can cajole them into your arms and have them at your every digital whim? A lofty goal, for sure. But if you can make it happen you will be able to lay claim to being the first person to do so. Although I suppose if you actually attempted to lay such a claim no one would believe you. Kind-of has to do with that whole “being anonymous” thing.
So, where exactly am I going with this? Well, my little epidermis-wearing humanoids, the answer lies in infinite regression. Try as you might to wrap your head around the last five paragraphs and your mind will surely revert back to the principle question and try having a go at said question again. It’s just like trying to ask if there’s a God. You’ll come up with a reasonably well-thought out and convoluted answer, then you will slowly realize that your answer doesn’t make any sense, you’ll tussle around with other options, then you’ll just say “fuck it” and take the side of believing in God because you’ve got nothing else, then you will drop your hand back into your bag of Funyons and go back to watching Family Guy because you also have low standards and a brain that mistakes pop-culture references for comedy.
The “fuck it” moment in this equation is that writing is something that exists and we do it because we can and it’s legal—for the most part (see fire-in-movie-theatre-exception).
Tags: answers, Longform, questions
5 commentsTHE ONE GAMING NATION – Call of Duty: World at War (Update)
This is really just an update to My Previous Call of Duty Blog.
Since our last encounter, I have beaten the game and playing all the various forms of Multi player and I have to say, the only thing I really find enjoyable is NAZI ZOMBIES.
It’s unlimited levels of unlimited Zombies, its always changing and it’s fucking fun as shit, too bad my gaming friends are pussies and wont play… so if there are any gamers out there that wanna play you know how to find me.
For now I’m going back Fallout 3 for hour 50, because I want as many of those achievements as possible before I finish that article.
Tags: Call of Duty, Call of Duty: World at War, COD 5, COD: WAW, Moondoggie82, world at war, XBL, xbox 360, Zombie Nazi
1 commentDAPS CLASSICS: AWESOME FLYING DRAGONS
Editor’s Note: This is an early DAPS classic and I can’t believe it’s not on the site!!! From The Banner November 2007. It was also pointed out that because this was published officially, it’s in the library of congress hahahaha
The land of Banneria, once prominent and glorious has now fallen on hard times. Sensing the demise of his formerly prosperous homeland a five million year old wizard named Glaceau decided to summon two young and mildly handsome Knights who rode awesome flying dragons. With a large boisterous voice, amplified by a novelty bullhorn decorated for St. Patrick’s Day, he with a slight lisp, called their names across the great land.
“Help Us, Knights of Marcus Hall, You’re our only hope”
Heeding the cries of the five million year old wizard, Glaceau, Our heroes mounted their awesome flying dragons and headed for Castle Banneria.
“What dost thou think-eth the problem be, Knight Chris?” said Knight Carlo.
“I know-eth not, but at least we have-eth these awesome flying dragons!” responded Knight Chris.
“Word-eth, Knight Chris. These dragons art quite awesome” replied Knight Carlo as they made their way to the wizard.
“I believe-eth that the awesomeness of our dragons should solve-eth whatever task we are tasked with!” again responded Knight Chris.
“Unless-eth of course, the task that we are tasked with, involves enemies with their own awesome flying dragons” again replied Knight Carlo “then we are in for an even more difficult task, than we are currently expecting.”
“However if we now expect the possibility of the task at hand involving enemies with their own awesome flying dragons, than we are now more prepared-eth than we were even moments ago before we expected such a possibility.” responded Knight Chris.
“Dost thou think-eth that our possible awesome flying dragon having enemies will also have awesome flying dragons that speak that crazy African clicking-language like our awesome flying dragons do?” replied Knight Carlo.
“You speak of Swahili?” responded Knight Chris.
“I believe I do,” replied Knight Carlo. “Though I am not certain.”
“Perhaps, though would it not be fortunate if our enemies had teach-eth their awesome flying dragons English,” responded Knight Chris. “So that we could intercept any communication between our enemies awesome flying dragons?”
“T’would be quite fortunate.” replied Knight Carlo. “And better yet, the enemies riding their English speaking awesome flying dragons wouldn’t be able to intercept the communications between our African clicking-language speaking awesome flying dragons.”
“And since both our enemies’ awesome flying dragons and we speak English we could possibly persuade-eth them to break their allegiance to our enemies and join us,” responded Knight Chris. “And in time, we could even have a chariot pulled by the awesome flying dragons which we have persuaded.”
“That sound-eth like the plot to the smash hit Snow Dogs, by Disney, starring Oscar Winning thespian Cuba Gooding Jr.” replied Knight Carlo.
“Ahhhh, aren’t all of our most novel ideas stemming from Hollywood films?” responded Knight Chris.
“I have-eth an idea!” replied Knight Carlo.
“What be it, Knight Carlo?” responded Knight Chris quizzically.
“We can sell the idea of our tale, involving both our original African clicking-language speaking awesome flying dragons and our newly persuaded English speaking awesome flying dragons helping us to save the Kingdom of Banneria.” replied Knight Carlo. “I am sure-eth that we can get Sir Jerry Bruckheimer aboard.”
“I’ll give him a buzz. Hold on.” said Knight Chris, suddenly out of character. “Hey Jerry baby, have we got a story for you. This one is hot…Okay…sounds good. We’ll get in touch with your camp tomorrow for lunch. Smooches daddy.”
“How did you have-eth his telephone number?” questioned Knight Carlo.
“Do you not remember-eth? Sir Jerry was the gentleman who procured us these very awesome flying dragons from his awesome flying dragon farm in Ellenville, NY,” responded Knight Chris.
“Ah yes. I remember that he tried to sell us those damn special edition Black Hawk Down DVDs.” replied Knight Carlo. “I hate that bloody trash.”
Just as Knight Chris was about to respond to Knight Carlo’s assault on a classic American Film, the two again hear the wailing of the five million year old Wizard, Glaceau.
“For crying out loud, we can’t hold out much longer. We have no choice,” cried Glaceau as his kingdom was further ravaged by scruffy-looking nerf-herders.
“We’re on-eth our way!” responded Knight Chris, with a slur.
“Yeah lady! We heard you the first time. Bitch!” replied Knight Carlo. “Mush dragons, mush.”
Just then, Knight Carlo’s awesome flying dragon, spoke to Knight Chris’ awesome flying dragon in that African clicking-language that they so eloquently speak.
“That poor bastard. His kingdom will never be saved and in fact will probably go down in flames within hours. For all of this morning, the Knights of Marcus Hall have done nothing but imbibe ale to excess and watch Snow Dogs three times straight.” said Knight Chris’ awesome flying dragon.
“That stinks, I had a summer house out in Banneria. Wanna eat these drunken idiots and score some hookers?” asked Knight Carlo’s awesome flying dragon.
“I know this great Asian massage place right off of the Bayonne. They really know how to treat a dragon,” said Knight Chris’ awesome flying dragon.
And they all lived happy ending ever after.
The End.
Another Editor’s Note: Check out all of the classic DAPS on Augiemania.com
Tags: dragons
1 commentPlaying With Fire
The one thing I remember about my boy scout days is going camping. When you go camping as a boy scout, you learn how to become more in touch with nature. There are also the obligatory activities, swimming, archery, putting up your tent with other scouts, and my favorite, the campfire. Now when you get a bunch of 13 year olds together sitting in front of a camp fire what do you think will happen?
I remember sitting in front of the campfire, tossing more wood in to watch it burn, crackle, and pop. Most scouts made smores but I was more interested in finding out what I could set on fire. I would grab some sticks, then leaves, a rock (I figured it was worth a shot), and eventually, anything I could get my hands on would succumb to the flames of the almighty campfire. Nothing was safe, not bread, or plastic, or decks of cards. Man, those were some good times.
Now being a full-fledge grownup my taste for burning anything and everything has not left my system. With male stupidity at my back I still pretend to be Dhalsim from Super Street Fighter 2 and shoot fire balls from my mouth (No, I’m not kidding I can shoot fireballs from my mouth.). I have learned over the years (after singing my hair, my eyebrows, my arms and multiple burn marks) that fire is not something that you play with all willy-nilly.
Over the years, starting at a very young age I enjoyed playing with matches. One instance I recall vividly was a time when my mother was doing her hair. She was applying the last bit of hairspray on and I thought it would be awesome to light a match and catch the small mist on the way down. Oh Boy was I wrong!!! After that ball of fire went and engulfed the room with its splendid light the next thing that was memorable was a hairdryer coming full speed at me.
Everyone has important, personal or whatever type of paperwork that they do not want anyone seeing but them. (This paperwork might include your name, phone number, address, social security number, etc.) Now a simple way of getting rid of this information is to just to shred the paper. For me though, I need a more reliable way than just shredding, it needs to be burnt to a crisp. As the genius that I am, I decide that to burn these documents while I am driving just in case I can’t burn all of it I can leave the small fragments littered about. When burning said paperwork in your car you need realize that you are going to burn something than just the paper (like I dunno your fingers? your shirt? your pants? the rug of you car?). I personally set a slick of oil on the road ablaze once. The only thought that went through my head was “I hope that oil isn’t coming out of my car.”
There are a lot more of things that you need to be careful of with Mr. Fire, playing with fireworks, making bombs, landmines or anything else that explodes. Remember kids if you’re not Johnny Storm AKA The Human Torch just be careful. If all else fails find yourself a stupid friend and watch him get hurt instead at least get a good laugh at that moron.
1 commentWATER PROOF MATERIAL CAN NEVER GET WET…MY AQUAMAN COSTUME CAN FINALLY BE COMPLETED!
Greetings Valtrex Users,
I’ve always dreampt of technology from comics to come to life. I want a web shooter, adamantium claws and Superman’s impenetrable hairline, but we will have to settle for a suit that repels water, never has to be washed, and can make you a faster swimmer. I’ll never get to slice someone into pieces while calling them “bub”, but I will finally beat Jimmy Hanlon in the annual swim-off in Kenosha, Wisconsin…damn 7 year olds think they’re dolphins…HERE COMES AQUASHAM…wow I should die.
P.S. : The fabric doesn’t have boosters on it, so all you tubby bitches should stick to land…all it does is reduce drag in the water, I don’t know how effective it is on a manatee.
Here’s the article…
http://gizmodo.com/5098011/nanotech-material-never-gets-wet-even-when-wet
Love always,
Your friendly neighborhood Spider Sham
P.P.S. I didn’t want to tell anyone but I was the original Batboy, or Batmite if you will…here’s me and Batghoul at a fan event in Tuscon. Don’t let my huge head fool you, in reality I’m very very dumb.
WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! WIN! 3Oh!3 Sweepstakes!!!!!11!!!!!
So there are some cool ass people at Photo Finish Records and those cool ass people are giving you the opportunity to win some cool ass swag from a cool ass band called 3oh!3!!
All you have to do to enter the sweepstakes is sign up for the all new DAPS email alert system which will notify you of other awesome prizes you can win and interesting, hilarious or provocative content provided by the amazing Dog and Pony Show Kids!
What are you waiting for? There’s nothing to lose, and awesome stuff to win enter now!!
Also be sure to visit those wonderful Photo Finish Records cats and 3OH!3 on Myspace!!
http://www.photofinishrecords.com
3OH!3 on Myspace
<33DAPS
P.S. (Legal-ish stuff) Two (2) winners be chosen (at random) to win 3OH!3’s album “WANT”, 3OH!3 posters, 3OH!3
stickers, and some added Photo Finish Swag. DAPS staff members are not eligible to win this contest. Winners will be notified by email.
Editor’s Note: You must be a registered user to enter the contest, but come on…This is a cakewalk, and you’ll get free shit, so do it. Support us and get something for it (maybe)…also watch this video it’s pretty freakin’ funny
1 commentTODAY, THE COMEDY HAS DIED…AND HOLLYWOOD IS WEARING THE BLOODY GLOVE…
Greetings Valtrex…I’m sorry,
I am holding back tears of anger…and rage. Today I happened upon a travesty…a mockery…an abomination. When I was younger, I treasured the movies I could watch over and over again and still laugh. Ace Ventura was that class of movie. Day after day I would sit and watch Jim Carrey’s antics and I would laugh from the pit of my soul every time I watched the dolphin trainer scene or the shark scene. Well today, the essence…nay, the soul of this great movie franchise has been raped anally with such prejudice and such hatred that I come before you a broken and changed man bent on revenge. You say, “Hey Sham calm down it’s just a movie”. Well, I tell you while I’m with your mom, “Hey calm down it’s just bukkake.” I will stop ranting because I have a list to write. Jim Carrey has probably pulled his face from between Jenny McCarthy’s exquisite breasts and fainted. Ace Ventura is dead folks…and they got it all on film…
I give you ::crying hysterically::
ACE VENTURA Jr. PET DETECTIVE
::Shoots himself in mouth::
THUD.
Tags: ace ventura, jim carrey, Movies
15 comments
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